Adventures in Manscaping

Okay so most people who know me would probably be a little surprised by me writing about this topic. Lets face it, they would be right. I am almost 56 years old and I have never even tried to do anything about my pubic hair. The only time I came close was when I had a vasectomy and then, all I did was shave my balls, 2 minutes and done. This is just not the sort of thing that a man like me has any interest in doing, ever.

So, what changed you ask. Well, I got out of the shower the other day and glanced at myself in the mirror and noticed the very tangled mess I had down there. I am a hairy old bastard, I pretty much have hair everywhere, I am pretty sure I am descended from Sasquatch and not too many generations at that. Anyway, I decided it was time to do something about it.

I don't know about anyone else, but this is a subject that has never come up between my friends and I, it was also not a part of that "Today you are a man!" talk every teenage boy is supposed to get. Consequently, I had no idea where to start. Considering the condition down there, I figured industrial grade sheep shears would probably be in order. However, after some research on the internet, I found that unless I was planning on becoming a groin hair stylist, I probably just needed an inexpensive body grooming trimmer. Jumping over to Amazon, I found many options ranging from $20-$50, most seemed to get pretty good reviews, so I just went for the $20 version.

Philips Norelco Bodygroom Series 1100

I am not going to give you step by step instructions on how to do this for two reasons, first I found I am terrible at this and second, there are several YouTube videos on this subject and of course WikiHowTo rarely fails to turn something up on any subject. So just go google it, you will find something.

All I am really going to say about the process is, that nothing really prepares you for it. It is weird, it is awkward and you are going to screw it up. Trim with a comb and scissors first and then go to town with the trimmers. Even though, as a general rule, I like my penis and I like touching it, this process was not in anyway masturbatory, I did not get aroused even a little in spite of all the tugging, pulling and other miscellaneous touching I did while attempting this.

Overall, I think this was neither fun or interesting, and I am not sure I am ever going to bother doing it again.